17th January 2003 at Thornden School

    Neil finally backed Mal into a corner and he was forced to agree to give the workers a game!

The Dads
Robbie Thorpe
Tim Hart - Brian Medway - Jim Allan - Mal Barton
Thomas - Dave Hedges - Tony Pascoe - Alexander
Owen Milton - Samuel
Sub; Chris Andrews

    The Workers were a player short so in true Corinthian spirit the Dads leant them Chris for the first half. Mal was threatened that his missus was going to take him out for a pint so he had to go at half time.

    The game kicked off and the Dads were taking it to the Workers but their forwards were a bit more slick thatn the Dads.  They had soon got a couple of goals on the board with a low drive into the bottom corner with Robbie's twittering, 'Close him down' ringing in Brian's ears and a well judged lob caught Rob a half inch off his line!

  Then in a classic moment Robbie's clearance rebounded of Mal's backside, fell neatly at the Workers' forward's feet and Robbie got a kick in the goolies for good measure.  The Workers managed one more lucky goal before the Dads revival began.

Dave Hedges launched a long range wiz-bang into the back of the net and Sam managed to get his tummy in the way of a goal clearance and neatly placed his drive wide of the keeper, to strenuous appeals for hand ball.  Unsportingly, The Workers played on but the Dads counted the goal anyway.  And so it was until half time with the Workers goal under heavy bombardment and mal trooped of the meet his missus at the Wellie.

Half Time
Workers 4 - 3 Dads

    Chris came back on to the Dads side and the game restarted.  Owen nearly scored a cracking OG (and had to soldier on with a torn hamstring - my hero!) but Robbie got a lucky thumb to it and deflected it over the bar. Things improved once Dave Hedge moved from the right to centre midfield and he scored a cracker. One of their goals come from a dodgy back pass from Chris followed by an excellent mis-kick from the keeper (can't remember his name at present but it was Robbie). Then, with ten minutes to go Robbie did a Schmeical and went up front to cause havoc and the final goal came from Brian after a pass from Tom to Robbie then to Brian (I suppose we must have won it on golden goal !!)

The final Score was something like;
Workers 7- 5 Dads
but the Dads got the golden goal!

    Man of the Match
       Dave Hedges

A terrific mid-field display, for a change.

        
    The Editor received a note from Sean Whelan shortly after the Workers game.  He wanted to reassure all of his fans fans that he is hoping to take up light jogging at the end of next week andf that he should be ready for action again in about a months time as long as he can get his super fitness levels back up to what it was before his alleged horrific injury.

    He would also like to thank the Coach for offering him a route into management with Springhill Dads, his reply was that he will consider it when he is well and truly knackered (about two weeks he reckons - a couple of years ago, Ed)

    Once again he thanks you for all your email and phone calls to see how he was he will answer all of the letters but this is taking time. 

    He had a call from Mel Stein (Gazza's Agent), he has asked if we would be prepared to give Gaza a game?  But Sean said that when he told him he was coming back he decided he wanted a guarantee of first team football which clearly we could not give when a fully fit Stealth Whelan returns.  Sean thinks he has now moved on to try and play for Eastleigh or someone like that. 

    Also Sean claims to have two new recruits for the team, David Perry and Graham Bennet both old asses and both very unfit (should fit in well then).  

    Sean finished his note with his kind regards

    This note raised a few eyebrows and comments from the Dads - one anonymous email from Jon Elms asked,
"Just who is this Sean Whelan?  Do we care?  I think not.  He has no va va voom" and signed his note, love Thierry

    Robbie enquired, " Is this the one we know as OG?"

    And Jerry seems to be a bit scared that his own - own goal scoring fetes might be about to be eclipsed, " I'd be a bit disappointed if he can score a better OG than me !"

    Robbie can only confirm Jerry's worst fears but invites Jerry to an Own Goal Fest to settle the issue, " You'd better believe it baby, maybe you need to make a comeback for one game so we can compare the OG meisters!"

    Paul Hanvey believes he is the Own Goal Meister, " I have also scored some pretty good OG's in my time.  If anyone can remember?"

    Dave Hedges' memmory is dulled by the scale and quality of Paul's output, " Paul there are so many - you'll have to narrow it down a bit mate!"

    That one he scored against Roke Manor in the 1994/95 season that won the Own Goal of the Year Award stood out for Paul.  " There was a really hard clearance/shoot way back in the early 90's that I got some award for."
      It was a classic - (The Dads loaned Roke Mark Shipside, they were still a player short and the kick-off had been delayed cos they had no kit) - Paul contrived to score his Own Goal when, in plenty of room and under no pressure . . . at all he calmly curled the ball into the top right hand corner from the edge of the box.  A master piece!  There were in fact two own goals in that game cos, for some strange reason, the Dads played Sniffer Smears in goal?
     Thanks to the Dads librarian for trawling through the cob webs to find that write-up (sad git).

    Jerry's got the hump and is ready to take on all-comers, " I'll be in The Dorchester on Friday night should anyone wish to discuss both of John Elms's left feet."

    This was when Tony O'Neill's alter persona surfaced when he slipped up and sent off a note refering to Jon Elms' dig at Sean signed as Lauren - incidentally showing his compassionate female side, "Is this the John Elms I know ????   "Scorning a fellow striker ?????  "Surely not !!!!!!!!     Perhaps instead of giving stick, do you not think it worth considering swapping one of your left feet for one of Stealth Whelans right ones love slack ( they all do )

    The coach, Mal (?) raises the question mark about Lauren's sexuality - live and let live I say! " Chaps, There is a nasty rumour going around right now that Ex Springhill Dad, Tony O'Neill, has stopped turning out because of a mid-life crisis. Slack has taken to dressing up in a micro skirt and blouse and now goes by the name of Lauren. And he has a go at the lads who demolished the Mojos.
Love Mal PS.
Don't worry about it, Tony, you can still play even with the extra bits - no one will take the mick."

    With that name Robbie queries, " I wondered if Tony played at right back for the CHAMPIONS!"

    Watch out for LETERS TO THE EDITOR in future editions!